It's Not Just Tax Day

If this isn't a piece of public relations genius, I don't know what is. And everyone thought it was just tax day! Please celebrate this day with all the fury and pride we can muster. Enjoy celebrating "failure, incompetence, dissatisfaction, disillusionment, mediocrity, frustration, vengeance, cynicism, futility, chaos, apathy, anger, sarcasm, tomfoolery, buffoonery, and jackassery. Indeed, all things that suck":

April 15 Is National That Sucks Day! - When You Can Celebrate Life's Failures

SHAWNEE, Kan., April 4, 2005 -- Life isn't a utopia, it's a sucktopia. History sucks, but history has nothing on the suckable present. People have done and continue to do unspeakable things to one another. For an in-depth review, go to http://www.thatsucks.net and click on Sir Isuck Newton. Learn and understand.

Here are some cosmic constants that suck:

• Life and aging. Rigorous scientific studies have shown that most things in life suck. For starters, 10 out of 10 people die. You will be in the losing group. You will die. Of cancer or heart disease. Or both. It will be a horrible, agonizing death. By the way, have you checked your health insurance premium lately? Gotta be happy with that, or stupid beyond words.
• Love. It usually ends in split ups and divorce. Or stay together bitterness.
• Family. Your family is unquestionably a stunning collection of ill tempered, dimwitted misfits, psychos, and felons. Why do you think you're different?
• Jobs/bosses/coworkers. Your boss is a breathtakingly stupid butthole who takes credit for your best work. And blames you for his/her failures. Your coworkers are professionally inept and socially repugnant.
• Evildoers. Evildoers want to send you to hell wearing gasoline-soaked panties, and not the thong kind. They prefer granny pants cause those hold more gasoline.
• Government. Your government taxes you to death. And lies to you daily.
• You think movies are ok? Books? Service? Your car? Must we go on?

Face it, most things and people are failures. They also suck. People don't soar with the eagles; if they could get off the ground they'd soar with the seagulls. Which means they'd probably sit on a post and soil themselves.

At ThatSucks.net we celebrate failure, incompetence, dissatisfaction, disillusionment, mediocrity, frustration, vengeance, cynicism, futility, chaos, apathy, anger, sarcasm, tomfoolery, buffoonery, and jackassery. Indeed, all things that suck.

Celebrate National That Sucks Day on April 15. Remember tax day? You happy about that? Did you know the Titanic sank on that day? Well now you do.

Got something better to do on April 15? We thought not. Celebrate National That Sucks Day.