Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Numbers Don't Lie

I realize (or realise as the Brits would say) this is probably only adding fuel to the fire, but A.P., I feel I must address your comments in public. Public being right here, not on a soap box in Times Square or something.

According to the Site Meter I have strapped onto this blog, I am averaging 49 visits a day. Now granted, most are accidental and most visitors aren't sticking around for hours to read my retarded ramblings, but as you can see on the accompanying graph, my numbers are still significant enough to make me feel like somebody. Somebody Damn you!! SOMEBODY!!

By the way, take note of the numbers in November. That's when I mentioned Tara Reid's boob falling out of her dress. If the only thing printed here sinks in is this, well then at least you now know that breast exposure makes you feel like even more of a somebody without even trying. Good to know.

So, in closing I'd like to say that although you, A.P. are probably one of my biggest fans, and you are probably only trying to encourage me to "challenge myself" and "push the envelope" and all that shit, but with the science of the internet and free internet tracking devices, I can prove that I am not yet done for. Thanks for the support though. Also, T.D. (I'm guessing it's you), thanks for backing me up in the comment arena.

In your face A.P.

5 comments:

doe said...

funny. i thought you were saying fuck you to the associated press. i was confused, and thought "huh. i wonder why bill is so up in arms about the associated press these days..."

and then i read your special commenting friend AP in your previous post. now i understand.

but can i still get a fuck you to the associated press? that would be odd and very very unresonable - making it ultimately cool and totally awesome.

doe said...

oh yeah - and bill - from one fellow biker to another -

!!!VIVA LA ULRICH!!!

mike said...

I was also confused as to why you were taking things out on the Associated Press. I was trying to figure out why they would care about your blog traffic. But now I see where your ire is directed. It is directed at a man who wears more colorful shirts than the AP could ever dream of.

Anonymous said...

You are done, you worthless hump. For every November we had a January. What did you give us then? Huh? More stories about your odd taste in crappy music!!! That's what. You suck.

Bill, I am trying to motivate you. SP told me I'm not fat enough. So I ate an 18 inch Italian sub from the local deli this weekend.....and polished off a bag of BBQ chips too. Now THAT'S reaching.

It's been over one year since I've seen you last. I'm officially done with my Rickman withdrawl.

Since you like American Idol,
you'll know this line.....

AP.....OUT!!!

Anonymous said...

Bill,
AP is just jealous! Don't let that mother fucker sway you from making the rest of us laugh our asses off...and of course seeing the occassional boobie!!!

TD